Turning 40: What I’ve Realised About Life, Business and Success
I’ll admit that I wasn’t particularly looking forward to turning 40.
As the big birthday got closer, I found myself feeling increasingly uncomfortable about it, although I couldn’t really put my finger on why. I’ve never been especially bothered about birthdays before, but there was something about leaving my thirties behind that felt like quite a big deal.
Perhaps it’s because 40 sounds so grown up, and I’m still not entirely convinced I feel like a proper grown-up myself!
But the birthday came, I had a wonderful time celebrating, and now that I’ve had a couple of weeks to get used to the idea, I’ve realised that I actually feel pretty good about it.
In fact, I think turning 40 has given me a slightly different perspective on a few things, particularly when it comes to life, running a business and how I measure success.
Appreciating what I've already achieved
Milestone birthdays have a funny way of making you reflect on where you are in life and whether things have turned out quite how you imagined.
Like most people, there are things I thought I might have achieved by this age, and I certainly haven’t ticked everything off my imaginary list. But when I look around at my life now, I realise there’s actually very little more I could ask for.
I have a happy home, a wonderful husband, two dogs who keep us entertained and two businesses that I’ve built myself. There are good people in my life, things I enjoy doing and opportunities that I’m fortunate to have.
That doesn’t mean I’ve stopped making plans for the future, though. There are still places I’d love to visit, experiences I’d like to have and plenty of things I’d like to accomplish, both personally and professionally.
I think the difference now is that I’m becoming better at appreciating what I already have without feeling that I should always be striving for the next thing.
Finding my own definition of business success
When you run your own business, I think it’s particularly easy to fall into the trap of feeling like you should always be achieving more.
There’s always another goal to work towards, another idea to explore or something you could be doing to improve things. Even when business is going well, it’s easy to focus on what hasn’t happened yet rather than recognising the progress you’ve made.
And, of course, social media doesn’t always help when you’re regularly seeing other business owners celebrating big launches, impressive sales figures and seemingly effortless success.
I run my branding consultancy alongside my online gift shop, and I’m proud of what I’ve built and how both businesses have developed over the years. Like most business owners, I still have plenty of ideas and ambitions, and I can’t imagine ever reaching a point where I feel there’s nothing more I’d like to achieve.
But I’m also learning to appreciate the progress I’ve made without constantly measuring it against what I want to accomplish next. Having goals is important to me, but I don’t want to become so focused on reaching them that I overlook everything I’ve achieved along the way.
After all, building a business isn’t a race, and we’re not all starting from the same place or working towards the same destination.
Becoming more confident in my own decisions
One of the more unexpected things I’ve noticed about getting older is that I seem to be feeling more comfortable with who I am and what I want.
I’m not suggesting I’ve suddenly become this incredibly confident person who never questions a decision, because anyone who knows me will tell you I can still overthink just about anything!
But I do think I’m getting better at recognising what works for me, what doesn’t and when it’s time to make a change.
I’ve noticed this particularly in the way I approach my businesses. I’ve become less concerned with following what other people are doing and more interested in building something that genuinely suits me, my strengths and the kind of life I want.
There are so many opinions about how you should run a business, how often you should be posting on social media, what you should be selling and what success is supposed to look like. While there’s plenty of valuable advice out there, it can become overwhelming when you’re constantly trying to keep up with it all.
I’m learning that it’s perfectly reasonable to take what I find useful, leave what doesn’t feel right and trust myself to make decisions based on my own circumstances.
It’s also something I regularly talk about in my work as a branding consultant, because having clarity about your business makes it much easier to decide where to focus your time and energy.
I think I’m finally getting better at taking some of my own advice!
Still ambitious, but with a different perspective
Something I definitely haven’t lost as I’ve got older is my ambition, although I think my reasons for wanting to succeed have become a little clearer.
I want to continue growing my businesses and enjoy the freedom and flexibility that working for myself offers, but it’s also important to me that the work I do has a positive impact on other people. One of the things I enjoy most about my branding consultancy is being able to help small business owners work through their challenges, recognise opportunities and feel more confident about the decisions they’re making. Knowing I’ve helped someone make progress with something that matters to them gives me a real sense of satisfaction, and it’s a big part of why I do what I do.
At the same time, I want to build businesses that are sustainable, enjoyable to run and allow me to have a life outside of work, even if I’m occasionally guilty of letting work take over more than I’d intended.
I’ve spent years learning, experimenting, making mistakes and changing direction when something hasn’t worked, and those experiences have taught me a great deal. I’m becoming more comfortable with the fact that I don’t need to have everything figured out immediately, and I feel much better equipped to make decisions because I understand myself and my businesses far better than I did a few years ago.
I still have plenty I want to achieve, but I’m increasingly aware that success isn’t just about what I accomplish for myself. It’s also about enjoying what I do, making a difference to the people I work with and creating a business and a life that I’m genuinely happy with.
Looking forward to the next decade
When I think about how much has changed over the last ten years, it makes me wonder what life might look like by the time I’m 50 (although we won’t think too much about that).
Hopefully, both businesses will continue to thrive, I’ll have achieved some of the goals I’m currently working towards and there’ll have been plenty of holidays, celebrations and good experiences thrown in for good measure.
I’m sure there will also be challenges, unexpected changes and decisions that don’t quite work out as planned, because that’s life.
But rather than worrying about everything I haven’t achieved by 40, I’m beginning to feel excited about what I could achieve over the next ten years.
I still can’t say I’m particularly enthusiastic about the actual ageing part, and hearing myself say I’m 40 is going to take a bit more getting used to!
However, I feel fortunate to be where I am, proud of what I’ve achieved so far and increasingly confident about the direction I want to take my life and businesses.
And considering how much I was dreading this birthday a few weeks ago, that’s a pretty good outcome.